Dainty Diva
Thursday, September 15, 2005
i guess.. there are many things which i shouldn't have done... sometimes... i felt realli sick and tired of it... sometimes i felt my hard work not appreciated...
I've tried.. to understand the things he is doin... such as when he go army... i tried my best to go understand what he mean by all those jargons.. how things work in the army... trying to let him feel that.. he is understood... we have common topics to talk abt...
Even i've tried to understand soccer... the worse and the most boring thing to a ger.. i've tried.. and again.. to have some common chat topics... Trying to understand the friends ard him... trying to play games which he play... hoping that we might be closer... but i guess i'm totally wrong...
Why make myself so miserable when my hard work is not recognised nor appreciated... i hated games... i felt that is a waste of time... but after todae... i realised... no matter what i do... what i try.. i juz couldn't understand him... he has more things to tok to his friends juz like i can talk and even curse and swear to huiling for all i wan... and she understand.. but he onli noe how to judge me... how bad i am to bitch behind ppl.. Why should i waste so much time and effort doing all these things which dun seems to fit to my intended purpose...
By putting all these effort in studies... i noe i will do well... but no matter how hard i try.. how much effort i put in... the relationship will alwayz be dull and dead... coz this is not only my part... it somehows depend on the other party as well... Why should i investing so much time and effort since i noe... i wun get any good and appreciation in return...
I will juz stop all this... i'm tired... if it's gonna end... it will... so juz let it end sooner...
